Goodbye 2010!

I can't believe the year is coming to an end. Granted, I say that every year.. and I'll probably say it next year too, but it's true. I can't believe another year has come and gone. So much happened this past year, it's crazy to reflect back on it all. Some things seem just like they happened yesterday, and others seem like they happened more than just a couple months ago. Either way, it's still amazing to see how time flies.

New years has always been my favorite holiday. I think it's a time for new beginnings, new dreams--and new opportunities. A way to let go of things that might have kept you down the previous year, and start fresh. Even though every day is a new opportunity to change, I feel that the new year brings so much more.. it's more of a "restart" button, I guess. I love reflecting on what I went through, and how I managed to get through it all...and really realized what I discovered about myself from each moment.

This past year, I realized that I have a huge heart--I discovered I still had the ability to care and love when I thought it had all run out. I had thought I was too weary to ever be vulnerable again, but unexpectedly I was proven wrong and I had allowed myself to fall for someone who I thought would never hurt me. Through experience, the reality of "nice guys (or well, girls) finish last" hit me, and I became a stronger, more cautious individual. Sometimes, no matter how much you care about someone--no matter how much you think you won't get played or used...it happens anyway, and it's out of your control. It was out of my control, I realize that--and this is why I grew from such an ugly experience. This helped me to know who I am, what I have to offer, and what I want.. This New Years, I'm saying goodbye to those struggles I had with that particular "relationship", if that's what you want to call it. It was definitely something I never thought I'd have to deal with or go through--but, weirdly, I'm kinda glad I did---it has helped me gain SO much more insight with people who are involved in those horrible relationships. I never could quite understand how someone could stay with another who cheated or anything of the sort--but with my experience, I now think I have more insight that would help me in my career later on, if I ever come across a situation like that. I never thought someone who I had known for 10+ years, and had knowledge of other painful events in my life, would be so heartless and horrible, but I was proven wrong.. But, I pulled through the situation and I'm glad to say I'm okay. :)

I am also saying goodbye to some drama I've had to deal with in the friendship world. I have realized sometimes having people to call your friends doesn't make them your true friends. I was strong enough to pull away from my typical group of friends, and have made many many more...and these ones I truly feel are actually worth having around. They are there for me whenever I need them, and not just at a convenience. (Thank you Annie!!!) I am so glad I was able to break away, and although it really felt like I was making a very lonely decision, I realize that having just a select few true friends are much better than having ten acquanitances. I think this took huge strength, and I did it. :) It's much better knowing that my friends will go the extra mile for me, just like I have always done for them.

On a lighter note, I've made huge steps this past year. :) I registered for my last semester of my Bachelors Degree--I graduate in May! I am receiving my degree in Human Development and Family Studies, and I'm also finishing up the requirements to be a Certified Family Life Educator. And, I applied to Graduate School (which is something I never really imagined I'd do) in the department of Educational Psychology for Professional Counseling! It is a three year program--I really hope I get accepted for this coming Fall, but if I don't--I will continue to take classes and try again for the next year. I'm anxious to find out if I get in, I'll know by the end of next month.

This past year, I was able to do something I've always wanted--I went on my first actual road trip. In August, I drove to Florida with a friend who moved there for a year with the Disney world College Program...and I made lifelong memories with experiences I truly will never forget. Honestly, I encountered some of the most amazing, life changing moments on this trip---I realized how truly independent I am, and how sheltered Utah really can be. Whether it was the crazy drivers on the confusing highways, the mountain-less scenery, the sketchy parts of Memphis, or the Omish road signs---it opened my eyes SO much. I am so lucky to have been able to go and experience this, I'd do it again in a heartbeat. I truly discovered my love for not only traveling, but for road trips... it brings a whole new light to my dreams of exploring.

This year, I have came closer to figuring out just who I am and what I stand for. I'm not just going along with my life, I'm creating it by choosing the way I react to the inevitable life experiences which come my way. I'm more cautious, headstrong, confident, and independent. Granted, not everyone has to tread through the same waters--but I'm taking my stream and I'm floatin barefoot. ;)

Anyways--Happy New Year..and yay for new beginnings! :D